Jessie Owen Builds a Family After a Paralyzing Car Crash

A fatal car crash transformed Jessie Owen's life in December 2012, killing her parents and leaving her paralyzed. The former Seattle sixth-grade teacher survived extensive rehabilitation and eventually became a wife and mother of twin boys, using social media to share her experiences and offer hope to people living with disabilities.

Owen was 27 when a snow-laden tree fell onto a car carrying her, her parents, her brother, her sister and her brother-in-law. Her parents died instantly, while her siblings sustained injuries and Owen lost much of her mobility and independence.

She spent approximately a year in partial hospitalization and rehabilitation. At 41, she describes the experience as a profound loss that affected nearly every part of her daily life.

Owen recalled feeling frightened during her recovery as friends, relatives and lawyers took turns staying with her in the hospital.

"I was scared to be alone," Owen said.

She also described the extent of the changes she faced after the crash.

"I had lost everything. Everything. My job, my apartment, my autonomy, my independence, my parents, my support system, my ability to drive, my ability to make decisions for myself, my ability to brush my teeth," Owen said.

Initially, she believed rehabilitation would eventually restore most or all of her previous abilities.

"Every version of recovery I pictured ended with me walking," Owen said.

As the seriousness of her injuries became clearer, she gradually shifted her attention toward what she could control, including relationships and personal goals.

"I got teary and I was like, holy crap, this is everything that I ever wanted. This is everything that I ever dreamed about, but didn't think I was going to get," Owen said, recalling the first time an ultrasound technician detected her baby's heartbeat.

She had not expected motherhood to become part of her future.

"I didn't think I could ever be loved. I didn't think I was capable of having children," Owen said.

The ultrasound revealed another surprise when the technician detected a second heartbeat.

"And here's the other heartbeat," the ultrasound technician told her.

Owen responded with laughter as she processed the news that she was expecting twins.

"Of course we're doing this the hard way," Owen recalled thinking.

She reflected on the unexpected complexity of her pregnancy and her circumstances as a woman with quadriplegia.

"That's just, you know, super on brand for me. And so now we have a geriatric, quadriplegic twin pregnancy," Owen said.

Regaining some function in her legs did not resolve the challenges affecting her hands, which remained a major source of frustration. She later participated in a six-month clinical trial involving repeated assessments, occupational therapy and external spinal cord stimulation.

Owen entered the trial cautiously but hoped treatment might improve her independence.

"went into it without a lot of expectations," Owen said.

She also explained why she was willing to participate despite uncertainty about the outcome.

"the possibility of greater independence mattered enough to me that I was willing to do practically anything," Owen said.

The research subsequently developed into Arc-Ex, a stimulation device approved by the Food and Drug Administration that is placed on the back of the neck to help improve hand sensation and strength in people with paralysis.

Owen said the treatment had not restored every ability she wanted to regain.

"I could not put my hair in a ponytail before this clinical trial. And I still cannot put my hair in a ponytail," Owen said.

Nevertheless, she noticed some improvement in her abilities and described progress as valuable even when it was gradual.

"get closer," Owen said.

She estimated that the treatment made daily life feel 5% to 20% easier, depending on the day. The experience also encouraged her to pursue relationships, including online dating.

Owen encountered a range of reactions from potential partners, including people who focused heavily on her medical history and others who treated her wheelchair as less important to the conversation.

"I went on a lot of really bad dates. But that was the fun of it," Owen said.

Eventually, she met the man who became her husband.

"Eventually I met a man with a mustache, so phenomenal. And I made him fall so hard, he put a ring on it," Owen said.

She discovered she was pregnant three months after their wedding. Although pregnancy was uncomfortable and the prospect of parenting made her nervous, her husband reassured her that caregiving involved far more than physical tasks.

Owen remembered his response when she worried about being unable to change many diapers independently or transfer herself into her wheelchair to reach crying babies.

"He said − I remember this so clearly − he goes, 'That's OK. I'm so happy to do that, because very little of being a parent is the physical aspect of it,'" Owen said.

Her husband encouraged her to focus on the emotional connection between parents and children rather than particular caregiving tasks.

"When you think about who your mom and dad were, do you remember them changing your diaper? Or do you remember them showing up for you, and talking with you, and playing with you?" Owen recalled him saying.

Her twin sons are now 4 years old. Through TikTok, Instagram and Facebook, Owen shares aspects of everyday parenting while living with quadriplegia and has attracted more than 700,000 followers across the three platforms.

She said seeing someone with a similar experience would have helped her when she was first injured.

"I would have loved to be able to see someone who had a journey like mine back when I was injured," Owen said.

She explained that, during her early recovery, she had no personal examples of women living with paralysis who had also found love and raised children.

"I didn't know anyone who was paralyzed. I certainly didn't know any women, and I certainly didn't know any women that had babies and fell in love post-injury," Owen said.

Her online presence has also helped her obtain speaking engagements and consult with disability advocacy groups. Rather than defining her life solely through the tragedy of the crash, she emphasizes the happiness she has found since then.

"always been pretty good about finding joy," Owen said.

She has come to accept a future that differs substantially from the one she imagined before the accident.

"This is, without a doubt, the life that I want to live," Owen said.

Reflecting on how her perspective has changed since waking up paralyzed, she said walking is no longer the defining measure of the life she wants.

"really isn't that bad," Owen said.